only help my unbelief


38 days
March 11, 2009, 12:43 pm
Filed under: Posts

In the midst of a crying Betsy who just wouldn’t calm down, I burst out with “Great is Thy Faithfulness.” She stopped crying. I immediately continued into “How Great Thou Art,” and I quietly shut her door as I breathed the last lines. In addition to truly praising Him for His greatness at putting her to sleep, it also occurred to me that there are few things sweeter than singing about the Lord to your babies as they fall asleep. I know that John Piper chose a hymn for each of his children, which I think is a great idea. What a legacy with which to grow up!

*****

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how the actuality of getting married to Christian mirrors heaven, when we as part of the Church are united with Christ. This is biblical, and it’s why we’re having Revelation 19:7-8 as our “wedding sermon.” But as I think more on it, there are more similarities. For example: When we got engaged, I got my engagement ring as a sign of Christian’s promise. Just like the Lord gives us the Holy Spirit when He saves us.

But the biggest similarity? Maybe that wedding planning feels like death. ‘Cause that’s what happens before you go to heaven. Every day I have to die to something someone else wants, something I wanted that we can’t afford, something that just isn’t going to work out.

And just like death, the only thing that makes it worth it is what happens at the end. Getting married. In 38 days. But no one’s counting.

*****

My best friend Emily (or Birth Control Emily, as some of you may know her) got married Saturday. It was surreal. It’s slowly starting to hit me that I’ll be doing the same thing in, oh, 38 days or so. And really, 38 seems kind of long, except for I remember when it was 95 days, and that was 57 days ago, which is 19 more days than we have left, and that feels like yesterday. Does that mean I’m getting married tomorrow?

*****

I’m learning how to say no to things. I’m learning that it’s better to undercommit than to overcommit, because you can always find something else to do.

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