only help my unbelief

Why I changed the name of my blog
September 12, 2008, 7:00 am
Filed under: Posts

There is a group of musicians at Red Mountain Church in Birmingham, Alabama, that produce some of the most beautiful, God-centered music I have ever heard.

I had listened to some of their songs on Christian’s iPod but had never purchased any, mostly because I’m at the point where I don’t buy music unless it’s on iTunes. I’m lazy like that.

But their music is finally up on iTunes, so there was nothing holding me back. Immediately I was drawn to the song, “Help My Unbelief,” with words by John Newton (who also wrote “Amazing Grace”):

I know the Lord is nigh,
And would but cannot pray,
For Satan meets me when I try,
And frights my soul away.

I would but can’t repent,
Though I endeavor oft;
This stony heart can ne’er relent
Till Jesus makes it soft.

Help my unbelief.
Help my unbelief.
Help my unbelief.
My help must come from Thee.

I would but cannot love,
Though wooed by love divine;
No arguments have power to move
A soul so base as mine.

I would but cannot rest,
In God’s most holy will;
I know what He appoints is best,
And murmur at it still.

In Mark 9:24, the father of a demon-possessed boy cries out, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” That dichotomy describes what faith is: God gifts us with faith to believe in Him, and throughout our Christian life, He grows that faith. For some, the growth is quick and constant. For others, like me, the growth sometimes seems like no growth at all, and seasons of abundance are few and far between.

Two years ago, I was diagnosed by a professional counselor with anxiety and depression. While my thoughts on psychology and medication are somewhat personal, the truth remains that it is only Jesus who can really remove fear and give us joy.

And so, since this blog is now focused on things more personal to my life, it made sense to rename it with something that is very much a description of my relationship with the Lord.

I’m still going to write about running and food and funny things that happen. This isn’t going to be a blog of gloom and doom. On the contrary, I want it to be a testimony of the presence of God in my life, because in His presence there is fulness of joy.

He is righteous in all His ways, and kind in all His deeds, but sometimes my faith is very small.

Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief!


2 Comments so far
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When I hear the new name of your blog I always think of A Severe Mercy by Sheldon Vanauken. A great book.

Comment by wordlily

i can SO relate to the title of your blog and faith that seems so small…..keep praying..God has answered that prayer for me after much praying and seeking my hope is growing and i’m feeling as if i can grow more in my Christian walk…i’ve been stagnent for so long..and as a side note, i also struggle with issues of anxiety and fear…i know how hard it is….blessings to you, beth

Comment by Beth

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