only help my unbelief

Sometimes God takes away just to show you how much He can give
August 25, 2008, 9:18 pm
Filed under: Posts

As I mentioned this morning/afternoon, I’m looking for a job. The weekend was spent on an emotional and spiritual rollercoaster. I would go from solid contentment in the Lord to feeling a bit stressed to all-out panic over not having a job – then back again.

This morning, it was hard to get out of bed, mostly because I knew the number one thing on my agenda was to hit the Internet, make phone calls, send e-mails, and have to do a lot of asking people if they knew anyone who might know anyone who knew of an opportunity. Somewhere.

I hate that. I hate feeling like I need to take something from others (which is probably a sign of a bigger problem).

It really, really hurt on Friday when I found out that I didn’t get the job I really wanted. God took that away from me.

I honestly don’t understand why I didn’t get the job – like most things between me and God. I had applied for that job after giving up another job that had already been offered to me. I felt like I was taking a big leap of faith, and I guess I was expecting God to reward me for it.

But that’s not how God works. Ours isn’t a works-based righteousness. We can do everything or nothing, and God’s grace ultimately depends on His character and His mercies.

I made one phone call this morning, and the person whom I called called me back at least four times, asking questions and checking in with me about how she could help.

Another friend whom I babysit for called Saturday to see how I was doing, and promised to call me whenever they need a babysitter until I get a job – and to pray for me.

This afternoon I got a phone call back from one of the businesses I called to come in to talk over some things with them next week.

Yesterday at church, two people remembered that I was looking for a job and promised to pray for me.

Tonight I got a call from someone I’ve never met, to babysit for their family. A good friend had given her my name because my friend knew I didn’t have a job right now.

And just now, when I sat down at my computer to continue the job hunt process, I had an email from someone offering to hire me to do some editing work.

As I am writing all this, I’m on the verge of tears. Friday I was close to asking God, “How could You take all that away?” Today, all my heart can think is, “God, how can You give me so much?”

If you’re one of the people I anonymously mentioned, you know who you are, and please know that I am overwhelming with praise to the Lord for your encouragement and support. My cup is overflowing.


2 Comments so far
Leave a comment


are you going to be taking the job? I hope its a good opportunity for you!!


Comment by ryanv

Actually, I haven’t been offered anything yet… just some temporary stuff.

Comment by Chelsey

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s